Sovereign, Gracious, Glorious!

Rest in God's sovereignty. Rely on God's grace. Submit to God's glory.

These three short sentences are written on a pink sticky note that is fastened to my computer screen which forces me to stare at them every single day. They are a small excerpt from Paul Tripp's book "Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands". They are three of God's greatest truths that we often skew and twist in our sinful hearts. I think I am beginning to understand how to live out these three things more and more every time I read them. Yesterday was one of those days where those three truths were put to the test.

Nick and I were given the news yesterday that I miscarried our baby.

There are many emotions I am feeling right now, but the one I keep coming back to is peace. True, my heart is full of sorrow that our baby will never see this earth and snuggle in my arms. True, I am angry that the existence of sin results in unborn children being taken from the womb. But more so, I am full of peace that our good, glorious Savior is holding our baby in heaven right now. I am actually more jealous of my child than I am upset! Our beautiful baby will never experience the sin of the world. He or she will never watch their loved ones die or be in physical pain. They will never be rebellious toward God or go through a season of doubt. Our child is in PARADISE. He or she is just waiting to meet us.

And that actually brings me JOY.

Knowing that this is all part of God's glorious plan allows me to rest in His sovereignty.

Knowing that God will comfort me perfectly allows me to rely on His grace.

Knowing Jesus is loving on our child right now allows me to submit to His glory.

A good friend of ours shared with me that through her miscarriages she relied on Jeremiah 29:11-13 as a reminder of God's truth. This made me smile because not only is it a fabulous verse, but I am so fond of it that we read that verse when we dedicated Owen to Jesus little over a year ago. Here it is:

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart."

Additionally, my best friend reminded me that the middle name we picked out for a boy was Elijah. In the Bible, Elijah never died - he was taken straight up into heaven on a fiery chariot. It brings me hope and joy to think that our baby was able to pass from this world to the next in a similar way. Maybe in a bit less flashy of a manner, but still - without pain and straight to Jesus.

All in all, I am immensely thankful. I am thankful for our community that is walking with us and being available in this time. I am thankful for caring doctors and midwives who have been alongside me every step of the way. I am thankful for our healthy son who gives me great joy. I am thankful for my supportive, loving, caring husband who is being sensitive to my needs and is constantly checking up on me. But mostly, I am thankful for our sovereign, gracious and glorious God who knows exactly why this is happening, how it will contribute to His plan and how it will bring Him glory.

Thanks for reading, friends. And thank you for your prayers. We are truly blessed.

Grace Abounding

Hello my few but wonderful readers!

I cannot believe how long it has been since I wrote. I keep feeling this nagging when I get on the computer; "Write! You know you want to!" And it's true - I do want to - I just somehow haven't found the time in a month and a half. Ugh! Not okay. Hopefully this will remedy my absence well and help me start to become more consistent in posting about the amazing life God has given me.

Ferry-ing to Orcas Island for a wedding

What can I say but that God has blessed our little family abundantly since I last updated you. My family of three has become four - Owen is going to be a big brother! My due date is April 30th but I'm hoping for a little girl on May Day. It would just fit in so well with our family (since Owen is a Fourth of July baby). Nick and I are going to find out the gender this time around just to make preparations a little easier. We loved waiting last time but I do want to know if we need to buy some pink accessories or just hang on to what we already have from Owen. We have both of the names picked out so when we come back from our ultrasound we'll know exactly who we'll be meeting in a few short months. If you want to know the names, ask me personally.

God has given me a wonderful first trimester yet again. I am tired, but not as much as last time. My appetite is a bit smaller but I don't feel sick. Honestly, I forget I'm pregnant most of the time because I'm so busy with Owen. It's nice to have something else to focus on - it'll make this waiting period go all the faster! I am so excited to meet this next little person. It's so amazing to me that though he or she only has webbed fingers right now, in just a few months they will be a whole person. It's so much different the second time around.

Additionally, God has blessed Nick's and my community group immensely in the last month. The summer was a hard season for us because we were extremely busy and our community group was inconsistent and small. We felt attacked multiple times over the summer and became discouraged. We began to question if we really were supposed to be doing this. But of course we are... God just wanted to work on us first. A month ago, we had four new families visit in ONE week! In one night, our group went from four to twelve. And the most amazing thing to me is that all of our group members are jumping in with two feet and want to get involved and serve immediately! I cannot believe what God was waiting to give to us. Each member of our community group has been a huge blessing to both Nick and I and I am SO excited to see where He leads us in this next season!

One of the most fun things ever just happened a couple of weeks ago. My best friend Melissa and her husband moved into our apartment complex. Not only that, but Mel's husband Justin got a job where Nick works so they have been able to carpool to work and encourage each other in their careers! It has been so much fun already having our dearest friends live so close but I cannot WAIT until their baby arrives! Mel is due in November so we are getting very close!

Gosh, now that I'm thinking about everything else that has happened since I last wrote I think I need to just list a few things off...

• I finished my first wedding season as a photographer. I learned a ton, grew in my skills and am very excited with the results of this summer. I cannot wait to give it another go next year! 
• We went to a lake cabin for the weekend with some friends. Thankfully the three of us were able to get away when summer finally showed up in August! It was a great couple of days filled with relaxing in the water. There was no internet, cable or cell phone service so we really had to depend on each other for entertainment!
• I started my own Mary Kay business. If you are interested in learning more about the company, purchasing our skin care products or hosting a Mary Kay party (and earning free product!!!), please don't hesitate to contact me!
• Nick and I celebrated our 2-year wedding anniversary on September 19th. We went out to dinner and afterward ate the top of our wedding cake. Yes, the cake actually tasted good! I guess four layers of saran wrap actually can preserve frosting for that long! We will also be celebrating our anniversary with a trip to Las Vegas next week. I am so excited!!!

All in all, I am completely amazed at God's grace upon our family. Our little boy is healthy, growing and charming as ever, Nick's and my marriage is growing and maturing as we learn more about Jesus and each other, I see God's miracles surround me as I hear stories about His grace to others and I am just peaceful. My heart is happy. The love of Christ fills me like no other thing in this world. There is SO much to be thankful for that if I listed off everything when praying at the end of the evening I would never go to sleep.

He makes my world a little brighter

So thank you, Jesus. Thank you for being better than the best earthly thing. Thank you for Your grace that covers me, my sins, my family, my community and this world. Thank you for never changing. Thank you for listening to my feeble attempts at praising You when I can never truly praise You to the extent that You deserve. Thank you for loving me more than I could ever possibly love You. 

Thank you.

Our Family's Purpose Statement

We are called to glorify God in all that we say, do and are. We will fulfill this call as a family by pursuing Christ-like character, by creating and sustaining a welcoming home and by reaching out to serve others in mission.

Character

 - Be disciplined in our personal walk with Christ

 - Use our individually unique gifts to serve God and others

 - Encourage and build one another up

 - Exercise humility and be open to learning from others

 - Take care of our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit

Home

 - Utilize it as an active picture of Christ and the Church

 - Use it to relax, reenergize and prepare to go back out into the world

 - Take care of it so we can open it to serve and welcome others

Mission

 - Ceaselessly preach the Gospel through our words and actions

 - Serve collectively and individually in areas we truly enjoy

 - Be financially wise so we can abundantly bless others

 - Enjoy each other through quality recreational time

I owe the inspiration of this fabulous idea to Tsh Oxenreider, the author of my new favorite book, Organized Simplicity. To all the work-at-home moms out there, this book is for you!!! I highly recommend it for helping you get organized and give you a much more defined sense of purpose in your role as a homemaker.

Before this book, I saw my role as a wife and mom as just that - a role I am called to fill. I now see it as a job. And for every job, the best way to be efficient and get the most out of it is to be organized in a way you can understand. This book addresses exactly how to do that. I am totally a fan.

As for our purpose statement, I am really excited to use this in our everyday life. My goal is to display it on our wall somewhere so whenever we come into scheduling conflicts, tricky financial decisions or vacation planning we can hold them up to this statement and make decisions based on what we are truly all about. I am very excited to raise our family with a clear goal in mind - hung on the wall for us all to see and reflect on. Above all, our family is all about Jesus, but this will give us some more specifics to refer to when life gets confusing.

And then this is where you come in. I wanted to post this on the web so all our friends and family can read this statement... and hold us accountable to it. If you see us acting outside these goals please practice biblical exhortation and let us know where we are failing. Because I know we will... we're human sinners!